


together scar by scar

by Doranwen



Series: a world less than I'd like it to be [6]
Category: Alphas (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Other Ships Not Mentioned in Tags, Post-Apocalypse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-12
Updated: 2018-07-12
Packaged: 2019-06-09 06:34:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15261519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doranwen/pseuds/Doranwen
Summary: The team is still a team, even though the definition of the word has changed.





	together scar by scar

"OK, hand me the beaten eggs now," said Rachel.

Nina gave Rachel the bowl of eggs she had been beating and watched Rachel pour them into the skillet, stirring gently. Rachel's movements in the kitchen were efficient and practiced; Nina figured she **might** look that skilled in ten years.

"The first dish of eggs is ready to go. Have them pass it around the table and then bring the bowl back so I can add this new batch to it."

Nina nodded and carried the steaming bowl to the conference room, which served as their dining room. The contrast between this morning and the previous ones was drastic. Instead of lying on an exam bed, Rosen was sitting in a chair engrossed in a conversation with Gary. Bill yawned as he took his seat.

Cameron followed Nina into the room. "Morning," he said with a nod.

Nina nodded back and walked to Rosen's chair with the eggs.

Rosen let Gary finish his sentence before speaking. "Aha, breakfast at last! It's been smelling wonderful," he said, taking a portion. He passed the bowl to Gary. "Take some eggs; they look delicious."

"It's all mixed up!" Gary complained. "The eggs and the vegetables. They shouldn't be touching. My mom always kept them separate for me, so they wouldn't get mixed up together."

"Gary, I understand that you don't like it when the eggs and the vegetables are mixed together," Rosen began. "I know your mom cooked them special for you. But things are very different now, and we can't always make everything special for you. Sometimes that takes a lot of extra work and we have too many other things to do. Now, I'll ask Rachel if she can set aside some vegetables and cook a little bit of the eggs separately for you next time, but it might mean you'd have to eat after everyone else, because she can't cook that much at the same time."

Gary frowned. "You're trying to make me feel calm. I don't need to calm down—I'm not having a meltdown." He took a small portion of eggs and gave the bowl to Bill.

Rosen blinked. "I didn't think I was doing anything."

"Yeah, I could feel it, doc," said Bill. "You were definitely putting out the emotions there."

"Maybe you need to, you know, practice some?" suggested Cameron as he spooned some eggs onto his plate and handed the bowl back to Nina for refilling.

Kat walked in on the end of the sentence. "Practice is good, if you need it…"

"So humble," said Cameron in between mouthfuls of eggs. "What would you know about practicing, anyway?"

"Maybe I have practiced something; how would I remember?" she retorted. She settled herself in the chair next to him and started peeling one of the oranges from the fruit bowl.

"Morning," said Skylar from the doorway. Her hand held Zoe's reassuringly.

Zoe looked around the room at everyone. She clung tightly to her mother's hand but otherwise faced them without flinching.

"Good morning," Rosen greeted them. "Find yourselves some seats; Nina will be back with more food shortly."

"Thank you," Skylar said. She led Zoe to a couple of empty seats towards the end of the table, and Cameron passed the bowl of fruit down for them.

"So anyone want to do the introductions here?" Kat asked. She gestured towards Skylar. "Though if I met you before this, I probably wouldn't remember anyway; my memory does this reset thing every month or so."

"I'm Skylar, and this is my daughter Zoe."

"How did you know to come here?" Kat asked. Nina returned, and Kat took a portion of eggs from the bowl she held.

"Long story; we met when they brought me in a few years ago," said Skylar. She finished separating the orange sections onto Zoe's plate and lifted it so Nina could serve them.

Kat raised her eyebrows. "They didn't ask you to join up?"

"Oh, they did," Skylar said, a grin lingering on the corners of her mouth. "I told them to take a flying hike. I don't really do teams."

Kat laughed at that.

"We all have to stick together, though," Gary insisted. "That's what Bill and Dr. Rosen said. We can't go off by ourselves; it's not safe."

Skylar smiled gently at Gary. "I don't mind being on my own, but that's not really happening these days." She glanced down at Zoe, who was quietly eating, and gave her a squeeze around the shoulders. "Figured I might join forces for a bit. That is, if that's OK with you?" She directed the question to Rosen at the other end of the table.

Rosen smiled at Zoe, who tentatively smiled back. "Stay as long as you want; we'd love to have you."

* * *

Nina dried the last dish and put it away, then looked over at Rachel with a question on her face.

"That's all for now; I don't think we need to start on lunch for at least another hour or so," said Rachel. "I'm going to go to the storage rooms, see if I can organize things a bit better."

Nina nodded as she draped the dish towel over the now-empty dish rack. She pondered her options. She could go study more signs, but that worked better in the evenings when Kat taught them. Three-dimensional motions did not represent well on two-dimensional pages. She opted for wandering down the hallway to the conference room.

Finding no one, she walked back out and past the various offices. She was unsurprised to see Bill's and Cameron's empty. Kat had commandeered the spare office as her own, and had a simulator video playing as she glanced from it to a monitor with a flight manual open. Nina left her to it and continued to the door of her own office, where Skylar and Zoe were sitting on the edge of the bed.

"No, you can't go!" said Zoe with a stubborn look on her face, as she held onto Skylar's arm.

Skylar glanced up to see Nina and sighed. "Look, I need to go outside and help Cameron. Nina here can teach you some sign language while I'm gone, and I bet she can draw you some pictures. You'll be safe here with her, and I'll come back for lunch."

Nina raised an eyebrow - had Skylar ever seen her sketch anything? - but smiled encouragingly at Zoe, who turned away.

Skylar knelt down in front of Zoe and cradled the child's head in her hands. "I promise I will be back for lunch, but I need to know you're safe in here. Nina's a friend of mine and she'll take good care of you while I'm working, all right?"

Zoe's face lost its defiant look, leaving behind fearful eyes. "You promise?"

"I promise. Cameron will make sure I stay safe, and I'll see you at lunchtime."

Nina held her breath as Zoe stared at the floor for a moment. Finally the little girl nodded, and looked over at Nina.

"I love you," Skylar told Zoe, giving her a quick hug. She got up and passed Nina, whispering "thanks" with a little grin.

Nina's answering smile lasted for about five seconds until she realized she had just been left with a little girl who she could not speak to. Hoping that Zoe could read, she pulled out her clipboard and wrote, _I can't talk to you with my voice, so I'm learning sign language._

Zoe studied the words for a few seconds. "What happened to your voice?"

Nina wrote again. _When the lights flashed, it turned my ability on all the time, and my voice makes people do things. So I can't use it around people._

"Oh. How do you do sign language?"

_You use your hands to say things instead of your voice. There's an alphabet with one hand, and you do signs for words._

"How do you say numbers in signs?"

Nina wasn't even going to try that one. _I don't know all the numbers yet,_ she wrote, _but maybe Gary can find a video of them._ She beckoned to Zoe, and went in search of Gary.

Gary was pointing out something on the computer screen to Rosen, who looked up from his chair upon seeing Nina. Gary stopped talking to Rosen mid-sentence and turned to see Nina and Zoe. "Oh, hi Nina. Hi Zoe. I was telling Dr. Rosen about what Russia and China are doing, because we don't have a government right now."

"It's probably better if we tell her later, Gary. Hi Zoe, are you hanging out with Nina today?"

Zoe nodded. "She was going to teach me sign language, but she doesn't know the numbers."

"Oh, I can find a video of the numbers," said Gary. "Here." He flicked some streams around and typed a little on the computer. "This video says it's the numbers to 100."

"What about after that?" asked Zoe.

"You have to start with the basics first. Dr. Rosen taught me that. You learn the basics, and then you learn more," Gary told her.

Rosen got up and gestured to Zoe to sit in the chair he had been in. Nina was still smiling at Gary and Zoe when Rosen stopped by the door, speaking in a low voice as he watched the two at the computer. "Russia and China are posturing over who will invade the US. The military we do have is mostly concentrated in Alaska and Hawaii, which were untouched by the photostims." He exhaled slowly and continued, looking at Nina directly. "We could be looking at war very soon."

Nina's eyes studied Rosen. Now that he was facing away from Gary and Zoe, his carefully constructed smile gave way to a somber look that matched his words. The lines in his face were more pronounced than ever, and his eyes could only be described as haunted. She could feel the pain radiating off of him, an almost-physical weight pulling on her. She bit her lip, wishing once more that she could speak. She settled for wrapping her hands around one of his for a few seconds and giving him a slight nod.

Rosen looked away for a moment. "I'll brief everyone this evening with the full details."

She watched him go, and wondered how much sleep he had gotten the night before—and how much he would get this night.

* * *

"Dessert is ice cream, and we have all kinds of flavors available, so you have options," Rachel announced as plates started to empty. "Zoe, when you finish your food, maybe you'd like to choose an ice cream bar?"

"You've got some salad to eat first," Skylar whispered to Zoe as her eyes lit up. The little girl sighed but scooped up another forkful.

"Before everyone goes back to work this afternoon, we need to have another meeting," said Rosen. "Some things have come up that we need to discuss. Skylar, you'd be welcome to join us, but I think it would probably be best if Zoe had something else to do."

"I can update you later if you want," Rachel offered.

Skylar nodded and turned to Zoe. "When you're done with dessert, I found a few things while I was out this morning that you might enjoy."

"So did I," said Bill. He got up and went out of the room for a minute.

"There, I ate all the salad," said Zoe triumphantly. "Can I have the ice cream bar now, please?"

Skylar nodded and Rachel smiled in response. "One ice cream bar, coming right up." She got up from her chair and started walking to the kitchen, calling over her shoulder, "Skylar, if you want some ice cream, go ahead and serve yourself first. The rest of us will eat ours during the meeting."

"Here we go," said Bill as he walked back in with a bag. "I thought these looked like they might be interesting. You can look at them when you're done with your dessert." He handed the bag to Skylar, who opened it to look.

"Thanks," Skylar said. "Tell him 'thank you'."

"Thank you," Zoe repeated. "What is it?"

"It can be a surprise for when you're done with your ice cream," Skylar told her.

"Here you are, Zoe," said Rachel as she handed the ice cream bar to Skylar. She set the rest of the ice cream down on the table, and Skylar scooped hers into a bowl.

"All right, Zoe, let's go back to our room," Skylar said once she had her ice cream. "We can take the ice cream with us."

"You're welcome to go exploring if you like," said Rosen. "The upstairs has at least one empty conference room with some good tables you can use if you want."

Skylar nodded as she gathered up her things. Zoe followed her out of the conference room, mouth full of chocolate and ice cream.

The others passed the ice cream and scoops around, but Nina decided to wait till the end. She had a suspicion of at least some of the discussion that would happen. A tiny curiosity bug bit, and she wrote on her pad of paper, _What did you find for Zoe?_ Her signing skills weren't quite up to complex sentences yet, and Bill's understanding of signs was still very limited.

Bill took the pad and read the line. "Oh, it was a bag of books for girls her age."

 _How did you know it was for her age?_ As far as she knew, Bill had no nieces or sisters… She regretted the question the moment she saw Bill's face change.

Bill took a deep breath. "It was in a bag at the feet of…" he trailed off, staring at his melting ice cream for a few seconds.

"None for me, thank you," Rosen told Rachel, who offered him some before carrying the cartons back to the kitchen.

Nina jumped up and picked up some of the cartons to carry, as much to escape Bill's presence for a little while as to help Rachel. The two women returned a few minutes later with their ice cream, and settled into their chairs with it.

"All right, we're here, what is it, doc?" asked Cameron.

Rosen took a deep breath. "Gary was updating me on some things this afternoon. With the government leadership all dead in the contiguous 48 states, Parish is attempting to work with our allies to receive and distribute supplies. The rest of the world doesn't know that he is responsible for the mass murder of much of the American population—as well as many Canadians and Mexicans—though there are rumors already."

"I'd be happy to tell them," Cameron said, a sharp edge to his tone.

"As would I," said Rosen, "but we have more pressing concerns. Unlike our allies, who ostensibly only want to search for any of their people who were in the US on October 22nd, Russia and China are interested in a little more. European analysts suspect that China is the only one that really wants to invade, but Russia doesn't like the idea, which may be our salvation at the moment. We could be looking at a war within the next month."

The table went completely silent, except for Gary. "Yeah, people think that China wants our land, and our military secrets. Because most of the military didn't survive, so there are lots of weapons that aren't protected."

Rosen continued, "This is not, however, our most pressing concern." He looked around the table, meeting each pair of eyes. "Given the circumstances, I'm sure none of you were paying any attention to a tropical storm called Sandy that developed on the 22nd. In the passing days, it has wreaked havoc and devastation on Jamaica, Cuba, Haiti, the Dominican Republic, and the Bahamas. Meteorologists in other countries have been keeping an eye on it, and they say it is going to hit the Mid-Atlantic coast—which includes New York Harbor—tomorrow."

The room exploded in chatter for a moment. "Whoa, hold on a moment," Bill said loudly, silencing everyone. "Doc, you're saying we're gonna be hit by a major hurricane tomorrow?"

"Yes, I believe so."

"Then we need to start preparing this afternoon." Bill turned to the rest of the team. "Forget whatever we were doing, this is priority."

"There is a high chance that we will lose power, and there is no guarantee when or if we will get it back. This will directly impact our food situation, so Rachel," Rosen said, facing her, "I'd like you to start planning for an extended period of time with little to no electricity. Skylar can go out with you to get anything you need."

Rachel nodded somberly.

"Nina, I'd like you to take charge of getting all laundry washed and dried as quickly as possible. We don't know when we'll be able to run a washer or dryer again, so everyone needs to make sure that they get any dirty clothes downstairs right away." He turned to Kat. "Your priority is still learning as much as possible. If we're going to be without access to video instruction soon, I'd like you to finish watching as much about aircraft flight and maintenance as you can before the power goes out. But first, I'd like you to watch something on safe climbing and rappelling."

Kat raised an eyebrow. "Okay…"

Rosen moved on without an explanation. "Bill, Cameron, we need to make this building hurricane-ready as soon as possible. I'd like the two of you to work on some sort of storm shutters, or boarding up the windows. Given the height, we may need Kat to rappel down from the roof and nail boards on the outside of any of the windows on this floor that we want to stay intact. The rest we'll have to board up from the inside—there simply isn't time to do a proper job of it from the exterior."

"So I need to watch a video on nailing into bricks too, then?" asked Kat.

"Yes, I think that would be a good idea," said Rosen. "Gary, I'd like you to do everything you can to make sure all electronic devices are fully charged and backed up. We want as little data loss or electrical damage as possible."

"OK, I can do that." Gary started to get up, then paused. "Is the meeting over, Dr. Rosen?"

"Yes, Gary, I think that's all. We'll sleep in our own beds tonight, but tomorrow we'll need to make up beds in here."

"Like a sleepover, Dr. Rosen."

Rosen only nodded as he stood. "I'll keep Zoe in here with me this afternoon. Rachel, I'll send her to you for a few minutes right now while I update Skylar. Can you keep her busy, maybe doing an inventory of the supplies?"

"All right," said Rachel. "Nina, can you grab my laundry, then?"

Nina gave her a brief nod and went to start on her assignment.

Rosen took a deep breath and double-checked that he was controlling his new ability before he stepped into the hallway. He'd already damaged one little girl in his life with his emotions; he would not make it two.

* * *

The scene at the table that evening was a subdued one as far as energy went. Kat's upright posture in her chair had given way to a slump onto the table with her eyes closed. Only her voice betrayed her wakefulness. "I feel like I climbed Everest twice over. How many boards did I nail in? I lost count."

Cameron rolled his eyes. "And who was being your counterweight, and lowering you all the materials you needed?"

Bill snorted. "Remember who had to find and carry all the boards here," he pointed out.

"Cheater," Kat mumbled. "All you had to do is amp up. You're not even tired."

Bill smirked a little and dipped another vegetable piece into the hummus Rachel had made. "Well, we got the important windows covered. We've still got the other ones - but we can tackle those this evening," he told Kat. The answering groan widened his smirk. "How's the food situation, Rachel?"

Rachel spread her hands out and shrugged. "We've got enough for two weeks, more if we make ice chests tomorrow to keep some things cool. Skylar's got some ideas on building a hydrogen-powered generator, but getting or making the parts for it could take awhile."

"I just hope everyone else in the city has the sense to get themselves somewhere safe," said Skylar. "We caught glimpses of people—mostly kids—on our trip here, but I didn't try to get any of them to come with us. Didn't want to risk Zoe and didn't think they'd trust me anyway."

Cameron shook his head. "If there are any near us, they've been careful to stay hidden; I haven't seen anyone, and I don't think anyone else here has either."

"We should look after the storm; there might be some injured," Rachel pointed out.

"That's a topic for an entirely different meeting," Bill told her. "Any interaction we have with anyone outside of this building affects the rest of us."

"Yeah," said Gary, "because we don't know what anyone else might do. They could be Red Flag, or try to hurt us."

"Or both," Cameron said darkly.

Nina took in the conversation quietly, not attempting to add anything. By this point, she had learned that one of the limitations of pencil and paper was that she was always late in adding her comments. Unless she thought of something important that no one else mentioned, there wasn't much use in trying to participate in group discussions.

A side effect of the enforced silence was that she had found herself noticing the little things more: the way a phrase left someone's mouth, brief facial expressions, subtle movements of the body. Things she might not have had the opportunity to notice had she been trying to participate in the conversation. It was only the slightest of consolations for the strengthening of her already-destructive ability—and the loss of its off switch.

The conversation came to a lull, and she surveyed the others in the room. Kat's weariness hadn't dampened her optimism, nor her ability to lighten Bill's mood and draw out a teasing side of Cameron. Gary was worried about the loss of power and his beloved electronic signals—but he'd still have the stars, Nina remembered, smiling at him fondly. He had adapted surprisingly well to their new world.

Nina wasn't fooled by Bill's "everything's normal" act, but he was functioning well enough on his own. Rachel seemed to find onions stronger than usual when she chopped them, and Nina had made it her mission to elicit smiles from the younger woman, a mission that was often successful. It was Rosen that worried her the most.

She flashed back to the evening only a day or so before Dani had died, and Rosen's words, "It's my responsibility." Was he blaming himself for this too, for the millions who had died? A sinking feeling inside her told her the likely answer was 'yes'. His role as team leader had gained more of a life-or-death nature than ever before, and who did he have to talk to? She didn't have to think long to come up with the answer, and it wasn't one she liked.

* * *

_I'll be back in a while_ , Nina wrote and showed Rachel. Nina left Rachel getting ready for bed and walked down the darkened hallway until she came to the door of Rosen's office. She rapped twice, lightly, and waited. When the door opened, she was hit with a strong wave of guilt, overladen with grief. She nearly cried out, remembering just in time to close her mouth. She lifted her pad of paper and wrote, _You're broadcasting_.

Rosen's wince was slight but visible, and the emotions swamping Nina quickly died away. "I'm sorry," he said. "I'm still—" he trailed off.

Nina could fill in the blank easily enough. "Still learning how to control it", maybe. Or "still grieving", even. She left his sentence dangling and motioned as if to enter.

Rosen stepped back to allow her in, and waited until she had closed the door behind her and turned back to face him before he asked, "What is it, Nina?"

_You need someone to talk to._

"I'm—" Rosen didn't have the chance to get the next word out before Nina's hand was up in a 'halt' motion.

She scribbled her next reply. _Don't try to tell me you're fine - we both know you're not._

He sighed, turning his head away. "This isn't your concern."

 _I think it is._ When he didn't respond, she added, _You can't hide behind the emotional distance argument now. I'm not your patient anymore, and you aren't my boss._

"What are you, then?" His voice was soft, expectant.

She met his gaze before writing the next words. _A friend._ She wrote one more line, then slid both pen and pad of paper into one hand as she showed him, _And right now I'm the perfect listener._ She wrapped her free hand around his, and he didn't pull away.

Rosen took a step back and sank onto the couch. He seemed to not even notice Nina's presence, or her hand around his. "They're calling it a genocide," he said finally. "Millions dead. And every survivor an Alpha." He took a shaky breath. "Now they're hunting down Alphas in parts of Asia."

He stared blankly for a moment, and Nina gently squeezed his hand.

"I should have stopped him," Rosen went on. "I wanted justice for Dani, and I didn't even accomplish that. And now…"

Nina was busy writing another line. _You did what you could._

"I should have done more, worked harder to find out—"

Nina's finger jabbed at the line again as the pad lay in Rosen's lap. She tapped it again when it looked like he would object.

Tears began gathering in his eyes as he squeezed them shut, and Nina could feel the emotions start to sweep over her again. This time, she braced herself and let them swamp her. She set the paper and pencil aside and turned to face him. Her hands came up to his shoulders, pulling him towards her.

His arms slowly slipped around her, and the emotions he was producing intensified till tears ran down Nina's cheeks as well. The emotional onslaught seemed endless, a bottomless well pumped into her. She tried to think of something, but only one possibility came to mind. It was risky, but she'd have to try.

Nina lifted her hands up and gently pushed herself back, taking Rosen's face between her palms. Tear-blurred eyes met hers as she leaned in and pressed her lips against his. The emotions shifted suddenly, a sharp lance of shock mixed with something she couldn't quite define. She leaned in again and kissed him softly, brushing tears from the corners of his eyes with her thumbs. A tiny stirring of desire snaked in from him as she kissed him again.

He pulled back for a moment. "Nina, you don't have to do this."

She studied his face. He had his shrink face on again, but underneath it she felt the attempt to restrain his hope, his craving for the distraction she was offering. She wondered how much control he actually had over his new ability—but did it really matter? She closed the distance and kissed him once more, a silent answer to a hinted question. The emotions rippled within her, and a warm ray spread throughout as his arms came up around her.

* * *

Nina drew the covers over Rosen and dressed quietly. She glanced at his face once more. The lines on it were smoothed out, and she hoped he would sleep peacefully. She flicked off the light and made her way to the bathroom and then the room she now shared with Rachel.

She slipped in quietly, not wanting to disturb the other girl, but the light was still on. Rachel sat reading one of her books, and glanced up upon seeing Nina.

 _You didn't go to sleep?_ Nina signed.

"I felt like reading," Rachel said with a little shrug.

Nina filed that away in her mind as she got changed into pajamas. She had gotten into bed and was about to turn to reach for the light switch when she caught the look in Rachel's eyes. It was a mixture of shock and puzzlement, and Nina realized in a split second. _You can smell…_ she signed hesitantly, trailing off.

Rachel nodded, still staring at Nina.

Nina sighed. _He needed…_ she began, her hands going limp as she recalled the intense emotional pain. She closed her eyes for a moment, then flicked off the light. She could barely make out Rachel's profile from the bits of hallway lighting that filtered through the blinds. She reached out a hand slowly, brushing a little of Rachel's hair back from her face.

Nina lay down and took a slow, deep breath. A few seconds later, she could feel Rachel lie down and scoot to her usual position, head on Nina's shoulder, arm across her stomach. Nina wrapped her arms around Rachel, one hand drifting up to trace paths through Rachel's hair. Rachel's soft breaths evened out in a few minutes, but Nina's hands continued on autopilot for much longer, and it was nearly an hour later when the room became still at last.


End file.
